Susan Jones – Writer

My Writing Blog

Susan Jones writes romantic drama with a touch of humour, and historical sagas as Lydia King. She lives in North Warwickshire, and loves walking through the beautiful woodlands where she lives, and gardening and reading are her pastimes.

I’m having a go at the 7’s from Patsy’s blog.  This is seven lines from Chapter 7 of my WIP., or more like my never-ending saga…

It’s a story I had an idea for, about a lady who wants to get away from it all and live in a caravan on the heath.  I’ve had lots of feedback on youwriton.com where the main problem is that I’m not sure which genre I’m writing in.  I want to write the story of a boy who’s in foster care and being bullied, somehow I want to combine the two, and get them to find happiness in their lives.

Today I’ve had some ideas of how to alter it, as it needs lots of altering.  I may even set it around 1912.  It needs writing as two separate stories, and then combining.

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“I was six, my birthday party.  Some useless party that was.  All I can remember is a fizzy bottle of lemonade.  Then Carl Jennings shaking it up and up and then.”  Magdalene stopped what she was doing, and went to put an arm around Timothy.

“It’s o.k. Timothy.  Those days are gone now.”  She had wondered about his scars on his face, but she knew it was best to wait for him to tell her how it happened, rather than to ask, and make him feel embarrassed.

“Not only did I get a pop bottle go off in my face.  I was in hospital recovering from that, and he came……..

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The gist of my story is that nobody’s perfect.  Magdalene isn’t, though I think she’ll have to have a name change, it’s a bit too Shakespeare.  The boy is scared and scarred and doesn’t trust anybody.  I’ve sent this out to twelve agents, and a few publishers, but from the feedback I’ve had it’s pretty awful at the moment.  I think I know that, but I love the story, so I will stick with it.

Hope I haven’t bored you with this indulgent post, and thanks Patsy for the invite of 7’s.

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8 responses to “Lucky 7’s.”

  1. Teresa Avatar

    Oh poor little Timothy – and horrible Carl! Sounds intriguing and I love the sound of Magdalene (maybe that could be her name, but you could shorten it to Maggie or Lena) – good luck with it x

    1. susanjanejones Avatar

      That’s a good idea Teresa, and seeing as you’re the expert in my eyes, I’ll go with that. Thank you for commenting. xx

  2. Patsy Collins Avatar

    I agree that it’s an intriguing extract.

    If you love the story then it’s likely that there’s plenty of good stuff in it and that it just needs polising up (if it’s really bad right now then hose it down first – but DON’T give up on it)

    1. susanjanejones Avatar

      Hose it down sounds a good idea Patsy, or looking at the weather, I might just put it in the garden. I’ve popped home from our shop for my flowery wellies!!! It’s like a monsoon out there. The story is a bit cliche’d, and everyone is in the right place at the right time. Like a foster dad knows where to find TImothy for example. I need to put more problems in. I tend to be a bit of a lazy writer, rushing to the conclusion, (being as I know it) before telling the story. I definately will stick with it because I know the characters as if they’re my friends now, and they want to be published, or hosed down and polished up. Thanks for your thoughts, you are with Teresa as being among favourite writers….

  3. suzicate Avatar
    suzicate

    Don’t you love it when you create characters that you love…even when you’re not quite sure how the story will work out. I have one that I’ve been carrying around for 15 years, no joking! I’ve restarted the novel countless times and every time I feel like I’m not doing what I need to be doing with him. Good luck getting where you want to be with Timothy.

    1. susanjanejones Avatar

      Thank you so much for your encouragement Suzicate. Maybe I’ll write alternate chapters, one for Maggie (that was Teresa’s idea and I think it’s brilliant) one for TImothy…. I know they won’t go away until they’re written and published..:)))) xx

  4. karenanne63 Avatar

    Not boring at all, I enjoyed reading it and I may be weird but I LOVE the name Magdalene 🙂

  5. susanjanejones Avatar

    Hi Karen,
    Thanks, I do as well, she’s eccentric of course, so I’ll have to have a think. Maybe I’ll have most calling her Magdalene, and her close friends cal her Maggie….. Thanks for popping by.

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